goriji ;)

Mehri Sri Lumba Kala Sundar kaha hai? lol :P

Archive for vlog

a belated Samhain post ;)

K tweeps hereโ€™s a (very late, gratuitous) Oct entry to the blog. I (for 1st time ever na?) stayed home, didnโ€™t go out (what w/demise of Castro Halloween etc..) & instead did buri nizer er.. shap ..er kuch bhi against voh evil donwalas lol ๐Ÿ˜› In actuality it took me til last nite (writing this mid-Nov, cheating on post date lol- itโ€™s new moon in Scorpio ๐Ÿ˜‰ to finish said evil diyan curse on the organized crime elements who r giving ur gori hell.. er, were, past tense, we now hope ๐Ÿ˜‰

But I digress.. also there was a Fri the 13th (in Nov) a few days back-tho Iโ€™d planned on finishing up the shap/sahera/black magick thingy, ended up doing a bewitching pyar spell instead ๐Ÿ˜‰ Yet to see the result but hopefully.. Anyhow the drama of evil crorepati bura diwana baap & me being evicted etc.. continues.. of course exacerbated by voh thug ulloos.. who in turn Iโ€™m making ek filim about lol ๐Ÿ˜›

Last nite I finally finished the spell began at Samhain aka Halloweโ€™en, a fortnight before. With any luck weโ€™ll see bahut mushkilon happening to the criminals & gori finally being free of some old curses etc.. that petty jealous morons graced me with (not :P) ages ago.. lekin ur some IT geek reading this who โ€˜doesnโ€™t believeโ€™ in this stuff na? Just wait n see! ๐Ÿ˜‰ U donโ€™t have 2 believe it, Iโ€™m believing it for you ๐Ÿ˜€

Next up (aka proper November blog entry) is a list of character parts for the trailer to my upcoming film, โ€˜Soufi & Meโ€™.. which if I didnโ€™t already say, is about goriโ€™s such-zindagi (get it? real life ๐Ÿ˜‰ experience ka San Francisco thug don maderchodus ๐Ÿ˜› Metlab: a suspense thriller feature film shot entirely in SF about the Arab mafia who are brazen sex traffickers, & with any luck (plus a little shap/sahera/bruja/hoodoo ๐Ÿ˜‰ gonna be nailed by the Fed presently ๐Ÿ˜‰ We hope..

At any rate, thereโ€™s gonna be tons of Arab (especially Maghreb aka Northern Africa originating, especially Algerian) male parts to cast, tons of goonday (aka gang member) walk on/no dialogue small roles that donโ€™t require any acting experience, and a few small/interesting desi roles, including a Sri Lankan hacker/pimp & a Tamilian ex BF of mine lol.

Speaking of which, I talked briefly with Samrat Chakrabarti on Twitter (heโ€™s promoting his latest film, Bombay Summer, which played at the Third I SF film festival a week or so back) -video reviews to come, still in need of re-homing my 350+ vlog vids after the semi-demise of revver.com.. Iโ€™m extremely hopeful he might agree to a small cameo in the film (btw there are two other desi male roles in the same scene, which is a humorous one ๐Ÿ˜‰ Just FYI.. heโ€™s the guy in Kissing Cousins (sorry if links donโ€™t work, not under my control but try โ€˜gorijiโ€™ + film title in google), Loins of Punjab Presents and โ€ฆ Karma Calling and and.. I LOVE him.. heโ€™s fabulousย ๐Ÿ˜‰

So get ur roles while their hot, n tell a dost na? Meantime u can see everything goriโ€™s a doin at any point in time here –> thatโ€™s meri tweets na? Just join twitter & add me! Be sure to check out my lists, got a great desi list going (including ppl like Shahsi โ€˜sacred cowโ€™ Tharoor, Rajdeep Sardesai (CNN-IBN) who did the SRK interview below, Karan Johar, Abhishek Bachchan, Vivek Oberoi, Preity Zinta, AR Rahman, lotsa fun regular desi ppl, including some pretty active Pakistan tweeps, etc..) plus lists of films, Arab/Maghreb stuff, human rights & of course, my โ€˜stop sex traffickingโ€™ feed na? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Plus tons more! If u join twitter u can subscribe! Whoo!ย ๐Ÿ˜›

If u wanna be in the film, see the next blog entry (above this one on main page) for specs on the peeps needed for the trailer shoot, and keep checking here or my tweets where Iโ€™m gonna be listing parts (many) needed for the film. Many of which donโ€™t require dialog/any acting experience etc.. which means itโ€™s open to anyone meeting the physical descriptions needed & willing to work for free ๐Ÿ˜‰ Please pass the word- especially please let any recent male immigrants from Algeria know (or people approximating such who speak French, Arabic & ideally, Darija- a local dialect which is hybrid of other two tongues) in order to try out for the lead parts- casting coming early Spring!

Meantime on the trailer, need to shoot ASAP in downtown SF.. donโ€™t be shy-tweet me up if you wanna be in the film! ๐Ÿ˜‰ pyar yโ€™all! See u on twitter ๐Ÿ˜€ Remember: Iโ€™m @gorisf ๐Ÿ˜‰

tweeps! :) sup?

K in case u haven’t noticed the column to the right lol –> I’m going crazy on twitter my peeps ๐Ÿ™‚ In the time I’ve neglected yeh blog (since early July 2009), ur gori’s tweeted about 1700 or more tweets & counting na? ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol if u wanna add me on Twitter, I’m @gorisf na? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Basically I’m focusing on a few areas: desi cheez (of course, including Bolly & SRK filim stuff), the hypocrisy of fundamentalist Muslim (oops I almost starting putting hashtags lol) attitudes, aur tweets about my vids (revver.com, voh lame site now owned by some goonda who’s letting it fall apart literally+ not paying anyone boo)- they r gonna be re-loaded onto a functional site ASAP (all 350+ of them & counting na?)..

..plus I tweet bout meri *NAYA FILM* whoo ๐Ÿ˜‰ Working title ‘Soufi & Me’ hai na? ๐Ÿ˜‰ aka ‘Soufi et Moi’ lol ‘เคธเฅ‚เคซเฅ€ เค”เคฐ เคฎเฅˆเค‚’ ‘ุงู„ุตูˆููŠ & ู„ูŠ’ etc lol! ๐Ÿ™‚ So there *is* a 2-part vid about my casting needs ๐Ÿ˜‰ for this no-budget narrative feature film (to get technical on u there for a minute)- aka u could be famous & not have to really have acting skills to do so but… haven’t posted the vid(s) yet as I’m in the middle of finding a new video hosting site for reasons listed above.

Also, didn’t forget about the (hopefully humorous) acchi desi cheez gori clothing & accessories line (srsly! 2 use twit-speak).. it’s just that.. yeppers, I’m about to get evicted from my ghur (cry!), rent hasn’t been paid since the last blog post, u can see that’s quite a long time. Plus I’m being stalked by such SF goonday na? (Real don peeps eek!)- which is what yeh filim is actually about, besides being a love story ๐Ÿ˜‰

So if u pray 2 any goddesses or gods of any sort, say a prayer 4 gori aaj, tik hai? The donate 2 gori’s Mini Cooper fund link in the archive should still (hopefully lol) work, in case anyone wants 2 donate the extreme amounts of $$$ needed for me 2 stave off imminently becoming homeless ๐Ÿ˜ฆ *sigh* Or of course, you can donate towards the film, which ideally has a ‘low low budget’ of $500K (basically a budget to keep me housed while writing the script, feed the crew while filming & pay 2 rent a camera/print the film, with little left for anything else ๐Ÿ˜‰ In any case, I’m doing the dang film, even if I’m living marg mein instead of ghur mein ๐Ÿ˜ฆ which is exactly what local thuggees would like to see happen ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

Oh if I didn’t say, it’s about gori kam trafficking bhi na? So if u wanna be a funder (or just lend gori her back rent $$)- catch me on twitter peeps & I’ll be bahut khushi 2 take any donations lol-or just say ‘hi’! ๐Ÿ™‚ Pyar jis & watch yeh space 4 more details on filim production & lol fundraising attempts!

BTW if ur bored (besides talking 2 me ‘live’ on twitter, u know u wanna, especially the more Tamilian-esque masti Sri Lumba Kala Sundars out there na?) u can check out my very own #Hashtag on twitter: #LHTE, which stands for ‘Learn Hindi Through English’ lmao. Because everyone knows that crappy Hindi book, my theory being that ‘Hinglish’ goes both ways: it’s not just some gora being unable to speak Hindi (or other Indian languages) but also desi peeps being unable 2 properly speak Angrezi na? So enjoy! All typos are directly copied from the book itself lmao!

Will bb soon jis, in the meantime, just read the next column & u got more details than I’m sure u ever wanted lol –> ๐Ÿ˜‰

catchin up n’stuffs…

K gori’s cheating here since this is actually being written in July (mostly) about cheez June se na? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Belated Khushi gay (uh bi!!!) Pride na? Here’s my rant about lack of Bi visibility to start things off…

gori's bi rant- khushi belated Pride 2009 peeps! ๐Ÿ™‚

Been hacked for about 9 wks, unable 2 get online 95% of the time, turns out this has 2 do with goonday aka thuggees ๐Ÿ˜› San Francisco mein, which have been harrassing gori ever since the demise of yeh M1M… augmented by garam Arab yaar & posse, got that?

๐Ÿ˜› At any rate, u can now see mehri Twitter feed (add me! @gorisf & say ‘hi’ with a DM or something na? Only if ur not spam tik hai?)

Meantime, basically blogging about the entire SF International Film Fest (<–go there to see my reviews! yey!) plus the Frameline 33 Queer (tik hai, LGBT if you must) film fest (both from SF) got obliterated. As u can see from that link, it’s very very slow going trying to upload the 17+ film reviews from that fest, seeing as I’m hardly ever able to keep a connection going for even 24hrs…

But don’t be sad, u can see gori’s twitter feed, so far with daily updates, to the right –> (or just add @gorisf tik hai?) ๐Ÿ˜‰

If u wanna see gori cry, check out this cool movie review from the Frameline Queer film fest:

gori's 'Edie & Thea' film review from Frameline 33 -SF Int'l Queer Film Fest 2009 ๐Ÿ˜‰

If u missed the end of the cafe lurks (reason: mafia peeps like usual), check this out (vid to the right, below)

gori cafe lurk 50+ ..SF thug edition ๐Ÿ˜ฆ muh... circa 4/09

Gotta jet before the thugs get my connection again! Be sure to keep an eye out 4 gori’s naya filim about garam Arab yaar, gori aur the sex trafficking scammers na? BTW status of gori’s naya desi lounge/club is currently unknown, depends largely on my dost’s willingness to take a risk of thugs trashing his nice new lounge/computer space, since both of us refuse to pay kickback $$$ to them (u thought this happened Mumbai mein sirf na?) ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

Pyar mehri jaans ๐Ÿ™‚ Be sure to watch my twitter feed to the right, I’m frequently in Union Square (theoretical film location) working on the script/watching thugs go by these days & would love some (non criminal sirf, please!) desi yaar company ๐Ÿ™‚

PS if ur wondering on the SRK in San Francisco cheez, let’s just say nahin, I didn’t meet him, it’s a little too painful to talk about ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Meantime, here’s a fellow tweep’s blog about being an extra in one of the last shoots in the North Bay before SRK, Kajal & KJo left for Mumbai *sigh*…

Aur here’s a photo of SRK standing in the EXACT SAME SPOT gori can be found standing at every time she is returning to her house via disgusting filthy BART (just stood there today- actually there’s another photo I can’t find right now of him standing approx where the woman ki sari is to the left, that’s what I mean lol, plus he shot across the street from my old house @Mint Karaoke Bar, plus he shot @CCSF, which I can see from my current place arggggggggggg!!!! <–a digression lol)… at least mujhe samjhe abi that it’s possible that my long dreamt of Bolly-style script starring SRK as a bi male (directed by Karan Johar) taking place on Nob Hill IS a possibility… zindagi bahut strange hai na? Let’s see how my first film attempt goes, then maybe I’ll have a shot at the SRK script na? Cross fingers!

Pyar y’all.. watch the twitter column or add @gorisf to get updates on filims, gori’s whereabouts & the (now ever-present) Arab & other mafia peeps na? Laters! ๐Ÿ˜‰

whoa… time flies na? :P

Tik jis it’s already the end of May (actually I’m cheating it’s early June lekin gori post-dated yeh post so I will have a May post na?)

Race riots have yet to start in ‘White Australia Forver’ (oh that’s Canada oops) ๐Ÿ˜ฆ phir bhi it should be coming any second now… just like ghetto Pakis UK mein na? Jao! Light them on fire n stuff! Just don’t mess with the historic architecture tik hai jis? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Seriously, what a bunch of heinous ferengi na? Beat the crap out of them! Isn’t voh Punjabi Kuchbhi Singh yaar who got sliced in the stomach (one of many, poor thing!) ๐Ÿ˜ฆ bahut garam na? Wanna marry gori & come to US yaar? *sigh*

At least now gori’s rants about UK/Aus/Canada & other non-US gora colonies being hella racist won’t be as likely to meet with disaffected shrugs by gori’s apathetic desi dostana aaj.. small compensation I know…

So why we’re here.. yeppers, gori is being actually chased now by such goonday na? Incredible but true! Watch for a series of vids on voh suherchod, coming soon to mehri vlog! ๐Ÿ˜‰

BTW (ha jis, gori’s cheating on the date here a little) lekin do u notice how Obama’s 6/4 Cairo speech sounds like some boring college professor’s history/economics/kuch bhi lecture? ๐Ÿ˜› Worse yet, what about the fact that the audience would only applaud when Obama either a) totally brown-nosed Islamic culture or b) quoted the Qu’ran (with poor transliteration lol).. BTW Obama it’s ‘ISlam’, IZlam nahin na? Guess gori’s garam Arab yaar encounter has opened yeh akon hara to the hypocrisy/narcissicism of Muslims (not to mention the US military establishment) in any case .. Gori’s not caring so much right now, since this is undoubtedly the first time since the artificial creation of the ‘state’ (cough cough) of Israel that an Amrikan pres has actually uttered that sacred word: Palestine.. Palestinian nahin na? PalesTINE jis! Sadly, this is a massive start… Still lovin Obama in any case, if for no reason other than the khushi circumstance of looking at a brown yaar pres ๐Ÿ˜€ yey!

aur abi, thodi poll gori se na? ;)

Peeps… Well gori’s actually really truly updating/re-doing cheez here this time…

Depending on the level/frequency of hacking (& how busy I get at the SF International Filim Fest na?) this could take anywhere from days.. to months lol ๐Ÿ˜› Anyhow, in the meantime, please check out yeh choti gori poll ..u can fill in other suggestions at the bottom- make sure they are friendly ones, since I’m sure u don’t want to experience gorigiri na? (aka: buri nizer!) ๐Ÿ˜› lols… BB laters! ๐Ÿ˜€

Holi Hai! :) Khushiyan Asian Film Fest bhi :P

Khushi Holi peeps! ๐Ÿ™‚ Time for the SFAAIFF (San Francisco International Asian American Film Festival)… gori’s going to attempt to see 20 filims in just ek week na? lols…

About dus (aka 1/2) of these are desi (South Asian/Indian, that is) films.. whoo! Should be uber-cools ๐Ÿ™‚ As I said in the intro, looks like (cross fingers) gori’s desi lounge (for lack of a better naam, I swear I found the perfect word on google late one nite, & failed to bookmark it lol- can’t even remember the (Indian, of course) language aaj, much less the name itself lol) is *tentatively* coming in approx June.. will be quite exciting! ๐Ÿ˜€

Anyhow, I’ve made a page that will sooner or later have all the insightful & bahut exciting gori filim review vids (ulloo WordPress doesn’t allow revver.com widgets, sigh)… meantime, it’s basically a link to the revver list. At the moment, you can save urselves time by just going here to see the video reviews (<– that’s a link na?), & after gori deals with the massive hurdles of the hacker loser ex who is still around after 3+ years (mass ragging na?) aur the inherent issues with revver itself du jour, then eventually the thumbnails will be here:

gori’s video reviews of bahut desi & other film from the 2009 SFIAAFF film festival! whoo! ๐Ÿ™‚

Tik here’s the intro to yeh filim fest:

gori's 2009 SFIAAFF film festival intro na? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Thrilling I know lol ๐Ÿ˜‰ Perhaps u’d rather see a couple of diwani vids about gori catching a djinn na? ๐Ÿ˜‰ lols… (hover to watch vid w/out clicking through, or click to revver if you wanna see a bigger goriji ;))…

gori catches a djinn- no sh*# peeps! (pt ek- djinn ka bhai ka garam Arab yaar, that is) ๐Ÿ˜›

gori catches a djinn- no sh*# peeps! (pt do- djinn ka bhai ka garam Arab yaar, that is) ๐Ÿ˜›

So I thought I’d be having some fabu naya flyers for the filim fest, lekin it’s the nite before the madness begins & the printer has died ๐Ÿ˜ฆ sigh… being too broke to pay to print them lols… we’ll see..

Tik in any case get excited, it only took an entire year (shukriya to having no funding to speak of, cept voh goonday that need to be awoided like the plague they are), phir bhi there’s gonna finally be a rocking yummy spot for desi aur desi-friendly peeps to meet na? Plus make DIY Bolly & other vids, etc.. ๐Ÿ˜€ Since gori is looking quite single again… can’t wait to get down to chillin in person over a drink or two with bahut garam ladkay, especially of the Sri Lankan/Tamilian/Fijian ๐Ÿ˜› & similar variety ๐Ÿ˜‰ ha jis? ๐Ÿ˜‰

So see u peeps at the films! ๐Ÿ™‚ & very soon, at mehri own sexy, yummy desi/gori/kuch bhi lounge! Yey! ๐Ÿ™‚

Happy Vday aur.. At last! Jai ho! Obama ;)

Peeps- things have been bahut busy/pagal for ur gori na? Well.. here’s mehri combined posts of the Oscars with (Jai Ho!) Slumdog Crorepati wins.. plus earlier Vday greetings… followed by an even earlier, previously unpublished bit about Obama’s election na? ๐Ÿ˜‰

Tik I admit after I got over complaining about sub flaws yeh filim mein… I started to cry, watching the chotu bachchiyan on the red carpet, going to Disneyland etc… all the while thinking how they are going home to plastic tarps slum mein, ek bachchi’s baap is dying of TB (Earth to Danny Boy(le)- can u possibly bother to get him some TB meds na?).. meantime, ek other bachchi ended up getting publicly slapped by his baap when he was too tired to give interviews after flying home etc…

Gori’s only regret- wish I would have made a more watchable (instead of gundi, wobbly, very hastily shot between filims at Third I desi film festival) vid na?ย  Kind of tripping on the Academy Award nominations.. so, here’s ek follow-up to the reviews:

gori's ek more for slumdog-jai ho! (pt ek)


gori's ek more for slumdog-jai ho! (pt do)

Aur, original reviews yaha hai for contrast (ha ji, there’s do parts na?):

gori's 'Slumdog Millionaire' (pt ek) film review from Third I South Asian filim fest 2008 ๐Ÿ™‚

gori's 'Slumdog Millionaire' (pt do) film review from Third I South Asian filim fest 2008 ๐Ÿ™‚

For Valentine’s Day na? Gori hopes u were able to awoid ๐Ÿ˜‰ yeh Shri Rama Sena (WTF?) suvar chod yaar na? ๐Ÿ˜ฆ *sigh* Not sure what’s worse, betiyan NWFP mein with no education, or voh ‘moral police’ (lol) bhains chodu na? They need to get laid! badly! ๐Ÿ˜‰

Anyhow, here’s gori’s Valentine to the perpetrators, aur mehri subsequent food poisoning vid (after inadvertently offending yeh Grand Duke at the SF Chinese New Year parade na?):

gori's Valentine's Day greeting to 'Sri Ram Sena' bakachodus ๐Ÿ˜›

gori got food poisoning for Valentine's Day ๐Ÿ˜ฆ lekin fu lions to the rescue! ๐Ÿ˜€

Abi, since the vids on Obama’s election didn’t exactly go up on time lol..

Tik hai… gori sochta yeh video says it all:

Meantime, like usual I’m fighting the hacker- mehri blog hits have fallen into oblivion for the usual reasons: hacker works between sites, so WordPress says ‘Google mushkil hai’ etc… for example… Glad if someone sees this front page, gori’s putting lots of work into it na? Be sure to check the articulate SRK vids about 26/11 aur the stupidity of psycho-Islam as carefully transcribed by gori below ๐Ÿ˜‰ (go to main page of the blog if you’re at the link for this post alone)…

Still working on the line of gori merchandise referenced below, haven’t forgotten about the naya desi lounge/club either (update: lounge tentatively starting in June 2009 ๐Ÿ˜€ whoo!), lekin it’s slow going without start-up funding (hint hint hint!! those of you who chaiye ek garam gori ladki to call ur own- help fund the space to meet her.. uh possibly me(?) mein)… tik hai… can u figure out that sentence lol? ๐Ÿ˜›

Pyar jis! Oh, also a very belated khushi 2009, now that we watched Obama undo about 50% of the evil of the Bush ‘administration’ (cough cough) in the first 24 hours.. aaj, hum proud hain to be Amrikans na? ๐Ÿ˜€ Time to celebrate the end of ek error, er end of a terror.. metlab end of an era na? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Out with the hate, in with the love ๐Ÿ˜‰

Speaking of which, Soufi I’m still waiting for your answer habibi ๐Ÿ˜‰